How We’re Raising Trilingual Kids (Without Going to China or Russia)
- Ka Yee Meck
- Jun 11
- 5 min read
Updated: Jun 18
Table of Contents
One of the most common questions I get is: how are your kids trilingual?
I made a video about this two years ago — but so much has changed.
So I thought it was time to share a full update on what’s working, what’s changed, and what real life looks like for us now as a multilingual family living in the UK.
Whether you're just starting out or deep in the trenches of bilingual or trilingual parenting, I hope this post gives you some real-life ideas and encouragement.
A Quick Intro
Hi, I’m Ka Yee — a UK-based mum, translator, and content creator.
My husband and I have been raising our children to speak three languages — Mandarin, Russian, and English — since 2016.
And the "surprise"?
We’ve done it all without ever taking them to China or Russia.
In this post, I’m breaking down the five key pillars that have helped us get here. These are the routines, habits, and strategies that we started with — and the ones we keep coming back to as our kids grow.
Let’s dive in.
Pillar 1: One Parent, One Language (OPOL)
This was the foundation of everything. OPOL stands for One Parent, One Language — and it’s exactly what it sounds like.
When our son was born in 2016, my husband spoke to him in Russian, and I spoke to him in Cantonese. We didn’t know anything about multilingual parenting at the time — this just felt natural.
Later, I switched from Cantonese to Mandarin. (I talk more about why — and the regrets I’ve had around that — in this video.) Since 2018, I’ve spoken only Mandarin to both of our children, and my mum does the same. My husband has stuck with Russian throughout.
Still, by age three, our son wasn’t speaking either language — just English. After speaking with a dad raising bilingual kids in French and English, I started a gentle “training” process to encourage active speech.
You can read about this transformation in my previous blog post or watch the video linked below!
Three months later? He was speaking Mandarin to me and Russian to his dad.
Our daughter, on the other hand, never needed training. She just picked it up naturally.
But when they both started full-time school, we had to be more intentional. The pull of English is real.
OPOL works for us because it creates clear, predictable boundaries. The kids know who speaks what. They never had to guess.
One time I accidentally spoke Russian, and my son literally said, “Mama, why are you talking to us in Russian? That’s so weird!”
It might not work for everyone, but for us, OPOL has been a rock-solid foundation.
If you’re new to multilingual parenting, check out my free 45-minute video course and downloadable PDF here.
Pillar 2: Reading & Writing Routine
This one might not be for everyone, but for us — it’s essential.
My husband and I both believe that speaking a language without being able to read or write in it feels incomplete. So we made literacy a big part of our kids’ routine from early on.
We started when they were about three. Just a few minutes a day at first — tracing characters, simple alphabet games. Now, at ages 7 and 8, we do 30 minutes a day, five to six days a week. Sundays off!
This routine helps with:
Vocabulary building
Focus and discipline
Switching between different writing systems (Mandarin characters, Cyrillic, English alphabet)
If your child is still a baby or toddler, just start with reading.
You can begin from day one — seriously. Babies love the sound of your voice, and they’re soaking up the rhythm and grammar of the language without even realising it.
For a detailed breakdown of our routine, check out this blog post and video.
Pillar 3: Language Classes
Language classes are a great supplement — but they’re not a silver bullet.
Our kids have been attending Russian Saturday school since they were toddlers. They do crafts, songs, reading, writing — even maths — all in Russian. It’s a level of immersion we just can’t replicate at home.
It also connects them with other Russian-speaking children and helps them see the language as normal, social, and fun.
As for Chinese? We tried Sunday school and online classes, but neither worked for us. The Sunday school wasn’t the right level. The online classes were overstimulating — and not very effective for the cost.
So now I teach Mandarin myself. It’s not easy, and it’s not for everyone. But it works for our family.
If you’re considering language classes, go for it — but remember, they work best when they’re paired with consistent support at home.
I've written a blog post and made a video about my thoughts on language classes - check them out!
Pillar 4: Family Interactions
Family is one of the most powerful and underused tools in multilingual parenting.
We don’t have a big extended family here in the UK, but we do see my mum every week. She speaks Mandarin to the kids — giving them consistent input outside of me.
My in-laws are in Australia, but they visit once a year. When my father-in-law stayed with us for a week last year, the impact was HUGE. The kids were immersed in Russian all day, and it felt so natural.
Even if you only see grandparents once a year or speak to them on video calls — it matters.
We’re looking forward to seeing my mother-in-law this June. The kids can practise their Russian… and maybe get some of her famous Napoleon cake too.
Pillar 5: Playdates and Peer Motivation
This one is so underrated.
I have a group of Chinese-speaking friends from my old job, and now we’re all raising kids who speak Mandarin. When we meet up, the kids usually default to English, but they hear us speaking Mandarin.
That modelling matters. It shows them this language is real, and used by real people outside the family.
My cousin’s son (raised in Germany with Mandarin and German) barely spoke Mandarin… until he stayed with us for a week. My kids don’t speak German, and he didn’t speak English — so they had no choice but to speak Mandarin to each other.
That week changed everything. He went home motivated and later spent several months in China. Now, according to my mum, his Mandarin is stronger than my own kids’!
Playdates. Cousins. Holidays. They all count.
Bonus: What About Immersion?
Do your kids need to spend extended time abroad to become fluent?
In our experience — no.
We haven’t taken our kids to China or Russia yet, and they’re already speaking, reading, and writing in all three languages.
Yes, immersion helps. But it’s not essential.
I know families who spent a summer abroad and it changed everything. I also know families who went abroad and… nothing changed.
The truth? Language learning starts at home.
If you’re consistent, if you show up — your kids will follow.
Final Thoughts
These five pillars — OPOL, reading and writing, language classes, family interactions, and peer motivation — have shaped our journey for the past eight years.
It’s not perfect. Our kids don’t speak like native children in China or Russia. And that’s okay.
We’re not aiming for perfection. We’re aiming for progress. For opportunity. For connection. And for that more global, open-minded perspective multilingualism can bring.
And that, for us, is the greatest gift of all.
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